So i raced today, it was cool yada yada i won the AG. The real fun came 20 beers later when we started coming up with triathlon pickup lines, if you follow me on twitter you have already seen these #tripickupline . The following may not be appropriate for all age groups but here is what we have so far.
- how do you feel about the consistency of GU?
- show me where you apply your body glide
- how much satisfaction do you get from your bike seat location?
- I'm a pro nip guard applicator
- I'm not a volunteer, but I'll mark your body
- I go HARD for 140.6......minutes
- I don't blow (up) early often
- My strongest leg is my third
- are you SURE you have enough fluid
- my coach told me to bang out an easy 6 after the race, but you look like a 10
- I can hold a 100 cadence even after the race
- my bike isn't the stiffest thing between my legs
- post race recovery involves LOTS of protein
- yea it's carbon, stop staring
- babe, post race hydration is key, and I have all the fluid you need
- my race entry is raw
- don't tell me to slow down, I know what I'm doing
- T3 involves us getting naked
- how about a recovery run and some sex? what no recovery run?
- your special needs bag is between my legs
- my finish always warrants a podium
- I ALWAYS get chicked, the girl always finishes first
- my favorite rack is yours
- its swim. bike, run bang....right?
- I avoid going down at all cost, but I play to win
- yes according to USAT rules I must wear my helmet while riding
- officer....she races 20-25
- you may start behind me but I will always let you come first
- I wanna put my GU in your bento box
- I enjoy getting spanked by older women
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Wow, some of those are just
Wow, some of those are just down right dirty. My favorite is "- my finish always warrants a podium" I can't believe that their was nothing about a nice quick taper before/after the race, and nothing about "bonking?" Maybe, "I never bonk in races, but you can show me how if you want." This list is far from complete. Also, I think the end of "- don't tell me to slow down, I know what I'm doing" should be something like "don't tell me to slow down, I handle this better than you handle your bike." I also think their might need to be a list of triathlon rejection lines. Those are always funnier if you ask me.
Damn, some of those are just
Damn, some of those are just CLASSIC. Thanks a million.
Best:
- my coach told me to bang out an easy 6 after the race, but you look like a 10
wow some triple x in there
wow some triple x in there for sure...
- Pacing is essential if you
- Pacing is essential if you want to finish strong.
When I put a clincher on ,
When I put a clincher on , it stays on!
how about we leave this
how about we leave this nutrition behind us and go and bonk together?
My favorite rack is yours!
My favorite rack is yours! CLASSIC!
Had me ROTFL the entire time. Nice way to start a monday for sure!
Awesome. I just laughed so
Awesome. I just laughed so loud that folks came into my office to see what was going on.
haha that is great, thanks
haha that is great, thanks for the laugh.
These are great, i have been
These are great, i have been laughing all day at work today.
Thanks
some of those could work ;)
some of those could work ;)
are those aerobars? or are
are those aerobars? or are you just happy to see me?
ALL I CAN SAY IS
ALL I CAN SAY IS FANTASTIC!!!!!!!!!!!!
my coach told me to bang out an easy 6 after the race, but you look like a 10...
WELL DONE!
BRAD
+1 This was awesome. I
+1 This was awesome. I really enjoyed the bluntness of "T3 involves us getting naked."
- my handlebars aren't the
- my handlebars aren't the only thing that are oversized
- you wanna hold my stem?
- you wanna help me warm up?
- my friend and I were just debating... Would you prefer an s-bend or a j-bend extension?
- my frame isn't the only thing that's stiff
- nice bike shoes... Wanna f#ck?
Check out my new sig.
Check out my new sig.
You should see what ELSE I
You should see what ELSE I can do with a wetsuit and a few NUNN tablets! ;)
"what do you think about
"what do you think about some cross training?"
Don't settle for 10 seconds
Don't settle for 10 seconds with a Co2 cartridge when you can use my frame pump all day.
Anton wrote:Don't settle for
[quote=Anton]Don't settle for 10 seconds with a Co2 cartridge when you can use my frame pump all day.[/quote]
Ok. Epic! My give up.
Wanna feel one with your
Wanna feel one with your ride?
sprinters finish quicker,
sprinters finish quicker, but ironmen go hard and long.
I need to drop my
I need to drop my thermometer in your lake to see if it's wetsuit eligable.
Why no, I didn't upgrade my
Why no, I didn't upgrade my trusty steed. It was made this way, all original parts here!
Your "rear derailur" looks
Your "rear derailur" looks like it could use a tune-up. I've got my tools with me if you want.
Your bike seat looks
Your bike seat looks uncomfortable, wanna try my face.
I've got a special cream to help with that chaffing.
It's more fun if we cross the finish line together.
Let me show you why carbon
Let me show you why carbon is so much better than aluminum.
While these sites may not
While these sites may not always provide support with insights for each or testing, personal responsibility must play a small sector in your encounter nsserials